Thursday, August 19, 2010

A Prayer

Dear God,

Here I am coming to you again. I know you are always here for me and to listen what I have to say. God, we are in a heck of a situation again. I don’t know how we are going to get out of this one. We have failed yet again, God. I know you know our shortcomings and failures before we even do. The biggest fear I have is failing my kids. What are they going to think of parents that can’t even keep them in a house? Having to rely on our parents to shelter us at the age of 40 and 42. What’s wrong with this picture, God?

I feel so alone right now, God. I feel like I’m in this dark tunnel that I can’t get out of. Help me get out of it. Please be with us no matter what happens.

Can I ask you a favor God? If there is any way we can stay in our house, please allow the people that we talked to last night find it for us. I want to stay in our house God. It’s the only way I’m going to feel good about. I don’t want to go to my mother’s house God. Not that she is a bad person because she isn’t. I just don’t want to have to live with someone else. We ought to be able to live on our own. But you see that’s where we have screwed up once again. We’ve over spent our budget once again and landed us in a place where we have very little choices of what to do. I’m not sure what can be done now God but if there is any way we can stay here, please allow us to do it. I know we can be happy anywhere we go but I would rather it be here.

I really don’t know what else to do. It’s pretty much a waiting game now, God to see if we can stay here or whether we are going to have to move out. If we have to move out, is there any way that we can rent a house or an apartment somewhere instead of moving into my mother’s house? Or were we meant to be there? Are you trying to tell us something God by having all of this happen? Were we meant to move out? Are we supposed to be somewhere else? Is all of this for the better? I would love to rent a house or an apartment somewhere but I don’t know if there is one big enough for all of us.

The thought of all of this just terrifies me, God. The thought of a constable coming out while we move out if we have to, terrifies me too. I’ve never been in a situation where the law has to be involved. I’m scared God. Hold me please??? What do we do from here? Where do we go? What direction do we turn in?

The most important thing to me is my family. My kids are my world and it matters to me what they are thinking about their parents. I’m so ashamed that we have screwed up once again.

Oh, and a couple more things if I may? Should we go to my dad and ask for the money? Is there somewhere else to go to ask for money to maybe save this place? If this place has to sell, then please let it go for a fair price. I would love for it to go for what’s owed. Don’t let them gouge us on it. I don’t want to sound greedy because I am not a greedy person but it would be nice if we came out on top from this sale with a little money in our pockets. I know that all that really matters is your family and friends, but a little money would help out too.

I’m praying to you tonight, God, so that a solution would be found that is in the best interest for all of us. If our house is meant to go, then so be it. But, at least allow it to go for a fair price like I stated above. Whatever happens, help us not to blame ourselves too much, God. Help our kids to get through it. Help us all to get through this situation and triumph!!

I love you, God…

In Jesus name, Amen.

i love you.

1 comment:

lakewaystones said...

That's exactly where to go....